Every year on each ship in our Navy the first deck log entry
of the New Year is made in verse. To
honor this tradition, the first entry in this year’s blog is presented in
verse. This year it is based in part on
Admiral Hopwood’s The Laws of the Navy (quoted in part in the second stanza below),
in part on The Night Before Christmas,
and in part, apparently, on the works of Dr. Seuss. Apologies to all.
Middletown
High School NJROTC New Year’s (B)Log Entry
Now this is the state of our unit,
Sad and feckless it may be,
For winning surely requires
Far more commitment from we.
Know that “On the strength of one link in the cable,
Dependeth the might of the chain,
Who knows when thou mayest be tested?
So live that thou bearest the strain!”
So rig fenders, my hearty weasels,
Rig fenders and come alongside,
For this is the state of our unit,
Be prepared for a troubling ride.
Now read thee the state of our unit,
Read it and see if you agree,
For I asked for someone else to write it,
But predictably the task fell to me.
So ‘vast all you lubbers, sheer off and make for port,
Find ye safe harbor, afore the cannons’ report,
For commitment is the watchword,
But sadly, so sadly, it is not often heard.
And now I speak of the Squeaker; the Squeaker she’s our CO.
General Quarters, set Material Condition Zebra and get thee set
for the show,
Right full rudder, shift your rudder, all ahead full,
Of elfin Jessica what more can be said?
That she’s mean and made fun of a balding white head.
And of the XO, well we fervently all wish,
That come next year she’ll be not such a fish.
Sam’s small and she’s whining
And Navy bound, so not so surprising
That in her ship’s bilges she’ll soon be a’ diving.
Good luck to her, we’re sure she’ll be thriving!
The Torpedo, too is Navy-bound, that much we know is true,
So three cheers for the Navy, three cheers for the gold and the blue,
But any cheers for Fergie?
Well, I’ll leave that to you.
What will he do? We
all ponder,
Where on the ship will he wander.
Two Rs, two Ns, but just one E, please.
Her sense of orthographical precision is something at which
not to sneeze.
Why it must be the Ops Officer, OPS say we,
And from her, it’s a little more C2 that we all pray to see,
‘Cause a little less confused, the staff hopes to be.
And what of the sheep, the prodigal sheep?
It made all the rounds, it saw all the sights, it really
climbed the heap,
And it sure fooled me, har-dee harr, tee-hee-hee.
But now the question must be asked, well it just must be:
“How you gonna keep ‘em down on the farm after they’ve seen Gay
Paree?”
Elephant’s feet, and mousing,
A brief comment follows, no grousin’,
On a knuckle draggin’, deck apin’, paint slingin’,
Cadet, one who’s just waiting to be hangin’ with the goats,
Why, he’ll be another BM3 McCarthy, our own “Baby Boats.”
But wherever he goes, whatever he does,
I’m sure his success will cause a great buzz.
Of our cadet master
chief, well what should we say?
That he is motivated, and dedicated, all of the day;
That he’s hungry, always hungry, always ready to attack,
His name? What is his name?
Well it rhymes with “snack.”
Burgers and chips, candy and fries, food piled so high it
would make strong men quail,
And yet, he’ll eat it all up, from the beak to the tail.
Next there’s our Logistics Officer, well she’s very quiet,
Surrounded by files, like a very slow riot.
Around her the paperwork flies in a great swirl,
And then she hides it, like a small frenetic squirrel.
And of ole A.J., what can be said?
His “Yellow Peril,” well it’s almost dead.
He’s slammed it and banged it;
Verily, he’s darned near pranged it!
Now what should he do, Oh where should he go?
Why of course--onto the Net, to seek his elusive twin tur-bo.
Our drill team they try, they try, try, try, try,
Their efforts are enough to make grown men cry.
Why they drill, they drill, they drill every day,
If they finally get serious, it might even pay.
But when they drill, they squirm and they talk,
And when they march, why it looks like a walk.
To compete for the win they’ll have to get serious,
Boy, when they do, why I’ll be just delirious!
To look ahead just a bit, the day will soon come,
We will have our inspection, our day in the sun.
All our cadets will turn out, and their families will see
Whether they rate Distinguished Unit—this year… could be!
Considering this, their shoes they must shine,
Oh those cadets, they’ll look just fine!
But that’s not enough, enough to guarantee
That inspection ready on that day they will be.
To be ready then, ready to go,
Their general knowledge they also must know.
If they do, it’ll be quite a show.
If they do, they’ll be all set to go!
And if they do not, why it’ll be quite sad,
Everything that could go well will instead be quite bad.
And what of our sturdy instructors,
So able and true,
Of them it could be said,
That they’re in it for you.
So to shipmates not present,
And to those not mentioned,
We wish them the best.
Trust us, we are well-intentioned.
Commitment is the law of our unit,
Commitment so simple and true,
And it’s the way to success for each, for every, and
especially for you.
So Cadets keep to your courses,
Cadets keep plugging away,
And it’ll all get better some soon sunny day.
